How to create and maintain a rock-solid masculine frame

Everyone in the manosphere is constantly talking about this - “Control your frame”, “Maintain your masculine frame at all times.” But what exactly is this frame we are talking about?

The term itself is not self-explanatory.

Simply put, your frame is how you hold yourself and exert yourself over your surroundings. You create your own frame. You decide if it is going to be of a calm, composed, physically, mentally, and emotionally strong man or a weak, overly vulnerable and emotional boy.

There are some prerequisites, however, that need to be taken care of, before you can expect yourself to hold a dynamic and strong frame. These 3 pillars include maximizing your intellectual, physical, and emotional prowess. The intellectual here means the basic know-how of female nature, inter-sexual dynamics, the red pill, etc. Not only that but also general knowledge and intellect. Read more. That is one of the most basic advice but the most important nonetheless. Read more non-fiction, more articles, more self-improvement blogs, read about your area of work. Read about whatever piques your interest and don’t stop learning.

Your physical capabilities matter as much. Put on muscle and lose the excess fat. It is not easy, yes. But get started now. Doesn’t mean you need to be in the “less than 12% body fat” range or wait years because that is how long it takes. But at least don’t look flabby and skinny. Hitting the gym is not overrated. It is one of the best things you can do to transform yourself. But is putting on muscle enough? Not enough, but at least 80% of the work is done. The rest 20% has to do with clean grooming, how you walk, talk, etc. They matter just as much. Work on them too. This physical pillar is the easiest to improve upon since the rules on how to improve are straightforward and well laid down. 

The last pillar is your emotional control and emotional maturity. A weak man’s emotions are all over the place just like women or even worse, a little kid. You need to work on this. Meditate, have outlets to release your stress, and become increasingly aware of your emotions. It is vital because an emotional and vulnerable man is an instant turn-off for every woman. There is no respect for a man like this. Have your aggression under control too. A man under a controlled frame is anxiety-free and calm. Work on this. Emotional control is not easy but vital. A man who has his emotionalism under control is indeed a strong man.

Most of this must sound like a self-improvement article to you but that is how it is. Again, 90% of having a strengthful, masculine frame has to do with mastering these 3 pillars.

So, what next when you have these 3 pillars constructed? You learn about how to control this frame.

The first time you meet a girl is when you set the tone of your frame. Hell, the first eye contact can dictate it too. An example - you decide to meet her on a date. This is an opportunity for you to set your frame of decisiveness. How? Instead of asking her where to go, tell her, “I know a great place. You’ll love it. We’ll go there.” Here’s another one - You see a cute girl at the bar. But instead of having that confident look on your face, you are timid, can’t maintain strong eye contact. Till the time you approach her, you have already shown yourself as weak, shy, and timid.

The lesson is simple - maintain your frame of decisiveness, and confidence right from the beginning. The better tone you set at the start, the easier it will be later on. Men suffer because they act all accomodating, indecisive, lost, and underconfident at the beginning of a relationship. What this does is that it makes it increasingly difficult to reset your frame later on because your woman has got used to it.

Do not let shit pass by. Setting and maintaining appropriate boundaries is, if not the most, ONE of the most important parts of a strong masculine frame. A woman will always test your boundaries. Every time you let her shitty and bitchy behavior pass, your frame gets a little weaker. Make your intentions, the boundaries you hold, and what you won’t tolerate very clear from the very onset of a relationship.

I lay extra emphasis on boundaries because more or less why men struggle in relationships is because they never fight or show their women appropriate repercussions for stepping over their boundaries. Not only do you have to set and fight for these boundaries, but you also need to be willing enough to leave if she doesn’t give in. Because if you can’t leave, then what is the point? Appropriate boundaries make a woman feel that you are strong, reliable, and have integrity. Women try to fight it off and weak men give in. Don’t be stupid. This is how women test if what you do is honest or if you are just putting up a facade. Maintain that frame no matter how much she acts like she wants to resist it.

Be authoritative. A man that lacks frame is his woman’s toyboy. There is no question about this. If you look around, all the betas you see who have to ask for their wives’ permission to hang out with their friends, have a separate “man cave” in their own houses, are under their wives’ boots are so because they hold no frame of authority. Rather, they have given this authority to their women. Women are not supposed to lead, men are. But since you lack authority and a willingness to lead - she has to do it. As a result, an unbalanced relationship ensues. A man with a weak frame will treat her like a queen while she treats him like a poor peasant at best. Hold the keys to the relationship. Be the man of the house. Take the important decisions, do not flake, and take responsibility for the consequences of those decisions as well. You treat your woman like a queen. But, only when she accepts you as the king and treats you as such. Do not ask for this authority, rather become a man a woman will naturally want to be led by through maximizing the three pillars discussed above.

Do not be overly vulnerable. How is a woman supposed to feel safe and secure in your presence if you cry at basic problems of life? How can she trust your leadership if you yourself are crying, whining all the time? Men can cry too - but the situation should be appropriate. Loss of a family member, friend, or such makes sense but crying or complaining because of basic troubles of life? It’ll turn her off like nothing else. Be strong and have some balls. Be a warrior, men. 

Lastly, if you are transitioning from a man who had a weak frame in the past to a man with a commanding frame now, your wife or girlfriend will get upset and frustrated. Why? Because earlier being a beta boy with no apparent boundaries, you gave her a territory of freedom where she could step all over your boundaries, step over you without any friction from your side. But, you will have to change ways now. It’ll take time and be uncomfortable for both of you to step out of that arena of comfort but you absolutely need to create that frame of appropriate boundaries, leadership, and decisiveness. She’ll resist it in the beginning but thank you later on.

That is all when it comes to creating a strong, masculine frame. It’ll take time to master it but once you understand the basics of it, you’ll start self-observing it more around you and in yourself too. Be conscious of where you are going wrong or if you fuck up sometimes.

Hold that frame.

Till next time, cheers.